10 Things to not do at a wedding
Weddings can be great fun to attend and to be a part of. However, there are some things guests should simply not do when invited to a wedding. Some may be obvious, others not so much!
1. Not RSVP
So many things rely on having an accurate headcount! When setting up a wedding, you must have a count for food, seats at the ceremony AND reception, and all the other incidental things that go along with having an event. When you are giving your RSVP, you are helping the bride not go crazy in playing guessing games when they are trying put their big day together.
2. Arrive too early/late
Weddings tend to try to run on a fairly tight schedule. Although a great many run behind, making sure you arrive within 30 minutes of when the wedding starts is a sure-fire plan. Before that, the bride and groom are still getting ready and getting pictures. The first look is happening and the bridal party is all getting their group pictures done. You don’t want to stress out the bride by seeing her and her dress early! With that, being late and interrupting the ceremony can be just as stressful. While some things cannot be helped, if you get there while the processional is happening (figure 8-10 minutes after the ceremony start), wait to sneak in and sit in the back.
3. Wear white
This one gets said time and time again, but it really is true. No white clothes! Not only will you be competing with the bride, it makes you stand out in all the pictures- and not in a good way. You get to have every other color of the rainbow that day, so let the bride have this one!
4. Complain about anything!
The bride and groom and have worked for months to get everything set the way they like it. There has been money and heart poured in to the day for them to enjoy with their friends and family- including you! There is no reason to complain to the couple, even if your food isn’t hot.
5. Bother the bride
This kind of goes with #4, but there really is no reason to bother the bride- even with simple questions. Chances are that any other number of people can answer it for you. Check in with a bridal party member, member of the families, or even sometimes one of the vendors. If they do not know the answer, they will almost certainly know who to ask. (As a quick aside- brides! Designate someone to be your go-to question answerer. Make sure they have as much info about the day as you can give them.)
6. Post pictures before the ceremony
This one is not only for regular guests, but for the bridal party too! Wait until after the ceremony and into the reception before you post your pre-wedding selfies. The big reveal should be as the bride is walking down the aisle, not as the guests are scrolling through Instagram on the way there!
7. Get engaged
Yeah… Unless you are VERY close friend or family member AND have explicit approval BEFORE the wedding, it is best to not pop the question to your significant other. Save your big moment for a time that it can be all yours! There is definitely no need to hijack somebody else’s.
8. Get wasted
I mean, don’t get me wrong. You can have fun. That is what weddings are all about! But seriously, don’t get drunk and/or wasted. Two reasons- 1. You start being not fun to be around. It isn’t cool to put that kind of stress on the couple who then have to apologize for any actions you may take. 2. There WILL be a photographer there. Trust me, there are some pictures you just do not want to have distributed.
9. Give a spontaneous speech
Unless it is asked for specifically, there probably is a reason the bride and groom did not ask you to give one. Don’t take it personally! A lot of times they are looking at time constraints or simply wanting to keep that part to a minimum in general. If you were not asked, but DO want to give a speech, run it by the couple first- preferably BEFORE the wedding day.
10. Switch seats
If you attend a wedding with a seating chart for the reception, please don’t switch your seats! The bride and groom have put a lot of thought into where everybody is seated and why they are there. Are you alone at a table where you don’t know people? Here is your opportunity to make new friends! If there are others you would love to hang out with or catch up with, it is wisest to do that later in the reception after dinner.